Wednesday, July 23, 2014

The Bay Area: Where the Landlord is King



So, as some of you who follow me on Instagram may know, I took a last minute trip up to the bay area to help my fiancee look an apartment for us. Recently, he got a job in Berkeley, and in order for us to be together again, we need to find a place to live. Simple enough, right? Turns out I was so horribly wrong. 

I knew finding an apartment in the bay area would be difficult. There are a ton of people, it is one of the most expensive cities in the world, and space is limited. Kind of like New York City, where I lived for four years. But what I have quickly found out is that New York City is a walk in the park next to hunting for apartments in San Francisco/East Bay. 

To give you an idea, we went to an open house in Berkeley for a 2 bedroom for $1900. A two bedroom is a mansion in the bay area, and $1900 is a screaming deal for that size. We thought we were going to get to this open house ten minutes early, be one of the first to arrive, apply, and call the whole thing locked down. So naive. When we got there, we were greeted with 40+ other applicants within the first 5 minutes! Ten minutes early, and already a line out the door. 
This is normal for big cities. I remember looking for places in Manhattan and finding a similar situation for basement level apartment with a 6 foot high ceiling, in the middle of the lower east side. 
But what was worse about this Berkeley place was the shameless schmoozing. Overhearing people tell the landlord that they will do free landscaping in the yard or how they will pay $500 more a month over the asking value.  But mostly, it was everyone trying to sell themselves as if they were the CEO of Google. 
I went to one apartment viewing, and the guy didn't want me to fill out an application, he wanted me to send him my resume, as in WORK resume. He said, "I don't care as much about credit score (although I do want to know that as well) but I care more about how impressive your resume is). Wow, I don't usually say this, but that man can go fuck off. Honestly. Resume? 

I went to go see this little gem below in the Berkeley hills near the university. 
I am not too picky. I will sacrifice space for a cute place any day. And I will also sacrifice amenities (washer/dryer, dishwasher, etc) for a great location. But what do you do when they are asking for $2000/month for a place that gives you none of that. 

The place is 600 square feet, 1 bedroom, no available parking, dark, no washer/dryer, a hike to anywhere interesting, and $2000 a MONTH. The woman said it had a great view...so...it's $2000. 

Please note that this unit does not include the upper level, that is a separate unit. This unit is the orange box and the little window to the left.
Currently, we are pathetically hoping to hear back from a place we applied with in Emeryville. Emeryville, mostly known as the home of Pixar animation studios, is quickly changing into a $6.00 cup of coffee type of place. Lots of hipster coffee shops and bars next to dingy homes that have been there since the 1980s. There are also lots of new apartment complexes that look really "nice" and cookie cutter on the outside, and depressing wall to wall carpet and dark and dreary on the inside. We found this rental online and seemed legit, and it is... kind of. This place is more like a guest house behind an actual house in a cute road. Lots of trees, flowers and a little yard. Has a washer/dryer, full kitchen, separate bedroom (which is a big deal here), bathroom, high ceilings, and a good amount of storage space. Seems perfect, right? It would be, if it weren't 300 square feet for $1900 a month. And this is something we are HOPING for. Who have I become? 

Another place we will be applying to today is a late 1920s building on the third floor. It is a one bedroom, with a kitchen and DINING SPACE (a luxury), bathroom, in a desirable neighborhood near Lake Merritt, and only $1925. Please note that this place is much larger and in a way desirable neighborhood than the $1900 closet we are hoping to hear back from, and only $25 more. Plus, its super cute! Wood floors, french doors, old cabinets and fixtures and a really cool vintage layout. There is even a FOYER....... cue heavenly choir and harps. 
A "cute" apartment in East Bay
The biggest problem with this place? The zillion other people that want it too. People will kill their own grandmothers for a great place (at a good deal) over here. So, it's no surprise that other applicants would quietly offer a higher amount than asking price for this little gem. That is something we are not willing to do. The asking price is already higher than the ACTUAL worthwhile price. I'm not going to trip over myself to give these slum lords more money. Maybe if I was determined to live in San Francisco, then I would forgo my principles and play the bidding war for a place. BUT WE ARE IN OAKLAND. I like Oakland, but I'm not about to pay through the nose for Oakland.
 But who knows, maybe I'll be singing a different story by next week.


So, lessons learned in the past two days: My fiancee and I (despite all of our hard work and friendly nature) we look terrible on paper, which means in Landlord land, we are are WORTHLESS. Lesson 2: now I know I am willing to pay twice as much I ever paid in Tucson, for a place three times as small. Last lesson: this is a landlords game out here. That crusty 90 year old woman or that guy with huge belly and butt crack peeking out of the back of his pants is GOD.



Hopefully, good news to come. Stay tuned.